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Oct 16

Var the Stick

25 Comments »

There is just so much wrong here!Click for the UNSHEEPED image

Good Show Sir Comments: Not as handsome as Sos the Rope, but more of a ladies man.
Published 1975

Check out Var’s friend Sos on the back cover

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.95 out of 10)
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Oct 14

The Triffids

11 Comments »

Blind man about to get a surprise in the Please Touch MuseumClick for full image

Perry Comments: I actually rather like the artwork for this junior, abridged edition (even the title’s abridged!), but remain intrigued by the gentleman depicted at centre. Either he was already blind, or, assuming he’s one of the multitude blinded the night before, clearly thought it important to locate/don dark glasses prior to venturing outside!

Published 1973

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 5.25 out of 10)
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Oct 13

Young Flandry

27 Comments »

Is that a space lobster crawling into the hot tub?Click for full image

Young Flandry and his sister-wives, Mormon missionaries to the Terran Empire.

Published 2010

You might remember Flandry from here

and here

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.86 out of 10)
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Oct 12

Sturgeon in Orbit

18 Comments »

I... think I'll stop at the next space station...Click for full image

Billy Awesome Comments: Pull out all the stops.  I want the head of Sturgeon as a devil, floating on an asteroid made partially of humanoid hands and torsos, and partially of a futuristic city that looks like a garbage truck, his hair a naked lady with a peacock feather magic aura, his brow haloed by dollar store xmas tinsel.  I want a topless mermaid riding a unicorn over a chain that secures nothing.  I want an astronaut trying to take a smoke break through his bubble helmet, and a nude baby on a floating cockle shell awestruck by the majesty of it all.  Don’t let me down.  Let’s make some magic!
Published 1964

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.53 out of 10)
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Oct 09

The Big Time

29 Comments »

She's killing me softly with her song ... killing me softlyClick for full image

Bibliomancer’s Art Direction: My name is Bibliomancer. I’m from 2015 in the future. I want a cover with a future-retro Amy Winehouse using a space music ghetto blaster to kill some dudes … and a satyr! Don’t make the art very good. I need it to win a ten-star rating on a website of terrible sci-fi cover art. Why are you looking at me like that?

Published 1961

You might remember this from here

and also here

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.23 out of 10)
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Oct 07

Copernick’s Rebellion

20 Comments »

Uh... could you turn me back into a tree...please... PLEASE!!!Click for full image

Good Show Sir Comments:  I’ve spent days creating this DNA model for the Scientific convention of abominations. To the conference centre Bill! Come on now, hurry… no complaining!
Published 1987

Many thanks to Chris M for sending this in!

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.42 out of 10)
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Sep 30

Singer to the Sea God

20 Comments »

And another thing it's freezing in here! Can we at least get some HEAT!Click for full image

Tom Noir Comments: Gawd, Sarah, I told ya there’s a reason we don’t come to this restaurant anymore!
Published 1995

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.58 out of 10)
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Sep 21

Sword of the Gael

40 Comments »

Hey look, it's Roseanne RoseannadannaClick for full image

Bibliomancer’s Comments: “Get your slimy squid tentacles off my cleaning lady. Domestic servants are hard to find!”
Published 1975

The epic wraparound cover

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.12 out of 10)
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Sep 18

The Day of the Triffids

21 Comments »

Looks like dinner is going to be space meat balls again!Click for full image

Perry Comments: John & Marsha stared in horror as hate-criminals threw rocks at the Toilet Door People’s picnic.

Published 2000

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.55 out of 10)
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Sep 16

The Puzzle Planet

29 Comments »

You moron, when I said wear a rubber on this date, I didn't mean on your headClick for full image

Bibliomancer’s Comments: As Sally dressed up in her new titanium hat she suddenly had second thoughts about agreeing to a blind date with that hunky astronaut’s college roommate.

Published 1961

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.64 out of 10)
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