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Mar 21

Let me see your war face!Click for full image

Perry Comments: Not to be confused with Jean Rollin’s infamous librarian vampire movies.
Published 1997

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.57 out of 10)
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Mar 14

My lord is not pleased with space sheep covering nudity!Click for full UNSHEEPED image

MisterBob Comments: Is that a dagger i see before me? No Melvyn its a fecking enormous sword – I love it!
Published 1979

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.24 out of 10)
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Mar 11

You might be wondering... how do I put on make up?Click for full image

Noel Comments: Having not read the book, I have no idea what the hell is going on. If anyone could give me a head’s up, I’d appreciate it.
Published 1974

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.00 out of 10)
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Mar 08

The primal urge... Synchronised swimming?Click for full UNSHEEPED image

Scott B Comments: Synchronized swimming… IN SPACE!
Published 1972

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 5.86 out of 10)
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Mar 04

He's been on the tanning bed all day... now it's time to get wild!Click for full image

Tom Noir Comments: That stare and that belt buckle. Pretty sure he’s thinking, “X marks the spot, ladies.” Then again maybe not, because that would make this a pirate story, and it’s already a sci-fi erotic spy thriller, so that might be a bit much.
Published 1975

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.33 out of 10)
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Dec 22

In Space... there's still a lucrative market for Christmas trees!Click for full CHRISTMAS FILLED image

Good Show Sir Comments: I’d happily read this on a bus! Maybe not a train… definitely a bus though. That’s us for Christmas folks cause I am ON HOLIDAY! Wooooooo! We’ll be back on the 1st January 2016 for an Old Year Sum up! Have a great holiday!
Published 2012

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.05 out of 10)
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Dec 11

I claim this H-bomb-blasted-radioactive-alien-hell-hole planet ... for Earth!Click for full image

Good Show Sir Comments: By the end of “Take Your Alien Child To Work Day” the little fellow was all worn out.
Published 1981

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.38 out of 10)
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Jun 29

STOP STOP ALREADY... they're already dead!!!Click for full image

Peter T Comments: Not sure how you wear your pants with a tail sticking out…. or how he killed all those creatures with such an erratic gun…. Girl looks nice though….
Published 1984

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.33 out of 10)
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Jun 04

They can't kill me! I'm the main character!Click for full image

Dead Stuff with Big Teeth Comments: I was visiting my brother in Chicago. I showed him the site. Then we tried to complete the sentence on the cover of this book. Here are our efforts –

THE HERO…has his face stuck in a trash compactor!
…is wearing green gelatin!
…holds snowmen holding rifles in contempt!
…gets to have a double iris!
…has such kissable lips!
…was almost THE HEROT!
…looks like the dude from Aphex Twin!
…knows Christmas colors are the new teal and orange!
Published 2005

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.81 out of 10)
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May 23

YES! It’s not only a bank holiday on Monday but the site is working! Woo! That means we can finally do another Honourable Mentions!

Thanks to all of you who constantly checked the site for over a month to see if it was working again! I missed all your comments, though oddly I actually got some work done. Anyway, I’m back to my normal pace now! Till the site breaks again…

Dude... you should get some cream for that or something!Click for full image

Scott W’s Art Direction: Ok, I need me a Ben Franklin, some lecherous 18th century dudes copping feels (or having their feels copped) by busty harlots, and oh yeah, can you possibly have Mr. Hundred Dollar Bill ride in on a cardboard lightning bolt with a pleasantly startled expression on his mug?
Published 1980

Click for full imageNext stop for Kong, the Betty Ford Clinic.

Matt Comments: It wasn’t the airplanes. It was chain smoking that killed the beast.
Published 1977

Click for full imageWatch out! You'll poke someones eye out with those things...

Click for full imageThankfully I travelled first class, so at least I'll get a bacon sandwich on my return from forbidden love!

Ian R Comments: Do you accept old pulp sci-fi magazine covers? I hope you use them, if only because of that… thing on the woman’s neck/shoulder. It looks quite uncomfortable.
Published between 1955 & 1958

BONUS SPECIAL OFFER!

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.95 out of 10)
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