Right, we’re in a recession, we need a cover that sells! Hmm, all black cover? You, sir, are fired! We need exploding cities in the midst of being attacked. A woman in a yellow and black striped catsuit, no wait… an alien woman! She can be holding a dagger while she peers into the foreground, completely ignoring the chaos behind her. If that doesn’t sell I’ll jump right out that window.
(Average: 7.23 out of 10)
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Hey! You there beside the water cooler. What books you into these days? Narina? Narninia? Fine, let’s say a lion. And you with the coffee, what do you like? Chicks with swords. Awesome, slap them both on there. Best lens flare the hell out of the background though. I think we need something to grab people’s attention!
(Average: 6.58 out of 10)Loading...
Pictures cannot describe the shine I want on this cover. Eyes will turn and minds will be altered. I want… NO… I need a guy floating in the air in the ol’ Jesus cross pose having left behind a dimensional portal. Have some dude popping out only to find a sexy women in knee highs and a tight leather dress. It’s just like those magic shows……
(Average: 8.41 out of 10)Loading...
You know what people are into these days… dressing up like strange animal creatures. So put a couple of people talking to some weird bunny person.. just like the convention we were at last week! Except less of the, you know, horrible single 45 year old men looking for sex. Take away from that with a huge space ship in the sky with the author’s name printed in horrible fonts.
(Average: 8.14 out of 10)Loading...
Well I want a red headed women talking to a camp looking dragon while she shows a bit of leg. Andre.. stop laughing! It’s not like your covers are any better! Jeeeezz… Ah F it.. just put a well built guy laughing his ass off in the background. That can be you Andre…you knob.
(Average: 6.02 out of 10)Loading...
You know the two things I love: big bosomed women and lizards. Have them woven in an epic battle, lizard versus women as she tries to slice at it with her magical blade. Don’t go all crazy on me though, concentrate on the boobs.
(Average: 5.91 out of 10)Loading...
An alien planet, with vegetation and all that, and another huge other planet in the background. And throw in a huge space ship taking off with a person throwing her fist in the air, making the reader ponder, “is she covering her eyes or simply shouting complaints?”
(Average: 5.20 out of 10)Loading...
Remember Arthurian legend where the magical pixies danced around Excalibur while some young redheaded wench reached out to grab the sword from a ghostly but awesome beard-wielding king? No? Well, that’s what I want, and you’re not getting out of those damn chains till you draw it!!!
(Average: 5.84 out of 10)Loading...
Typical blonde helpless maiden, possibly a wench from the local drinkery. Then a typical bartender looking guy with perm, a wooden magic wand, a glowing wrist band and a red misty entity coming from the side. Come on… do I have to think of everything?!?!
(Average: 5.28 out of 10)Loading...
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