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Oct 29

His pleasure planet is Uranus.Click for full image

Good Show Sir Comments: Collection of sci-fi romance stories, including: “Wild Men and Wormholes.”
Published 2007

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.49 out of 10)
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Oct 28

NOOOOOOO! My favourite rocket! I mean ... Jeff!!! That's Jeff getting BBQ'ed right? Click for slightly larger image

Frank Comments: Looks kinda rough to be that guy seen in silhouette out near the rocket’s exhaust.
Published 1963

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 5.64 out of 10)
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Oct 27

Wandl must be one of those Dwarf PlanetsClick for full image

Scott B. Comments: Who’s the cutest little invader? You are, Wandl! Yes you are!
Published 1961

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.68 out of 10)
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Oct 23

Starring Vin Diesel as Bobo, the microcephalic, mutant dwarf. Click for full image

Good Show Sir Comments: The hottie on the right is the mutant Mother of Blades. From the book:
“She faced him, her four calloused hands set firmly on her broad hips. Her eyes were reddened from staring into the furnace in which she heated her metal; sweat ran down her wrinkled face into the sparse gray mustache which disfigured her upper lip, and dripped onto her bare chest…” Spot on, cover artist Patrick Turner.

Published 2007

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.39 out of 10)
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Oct 19

Don't let looks deceive you... this chair is actually incredibly uncomfortable.Click for full image

Mirrie’s Art Direction: Sci-fi villians must be as campy as possible. Hmmm, maybe give him a chair made of antlers like Jareth from Labyrinth had, and have him wearing a gold suit. 70’s babe on the left of him, sinister chimp-surgeon to the right. And behind them all looms the Angel of Death, looking like if Peter Capaldi played Grandpa Rick.
Published 1975

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.79 out of 10)
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Oct 16

There is just so much wrong here!Click for the UNSHEEPED image

Good Show Sir Comments: Not as handsome as Sos the Rope, but more of a ladies man.
Published 1975

Check out Var’s friend Sos on the back cover

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.95 out of 10)
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Oct 13

Is that a space lobster crawling into the hot tub?Click for full image

Young Flandry and his sister-wives, Mormon missionaries to the Terran Empire.

Published 2010

You might remember Flandry from here

and here

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.86 out of 10)
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Oct 12

I... think I'll stop at the next space station...Click for full image

Billy Awesome Comments: Pull out all the stops.  I want the head of Sturgeon as a devil, floating on an asteroid made partially of humanoid hands and torsos, and partially of a futuristic city that looks like a garbage truck, his hair a naked lady with a peacock feather magic aura, his brow haloed by dollar store xmas tinsel.  I want a topless mermaid riding a unicorn over a chain that secures nothing.  I want an astronaut trying to take a smoke break through his bubble helmet, and a nude baby on a floating cockle shell awestruck by the majesty of it all.  Don’t let me down.  Let’s make some magic!
Published 1964

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.53 out of 10)
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Oct 09

She's killing me softly with her song ... killing me softlyClick for full image

Bibliomancer’s Art Direction: My name is Bibliomancer. I’m from 2015 in the future. I want a cover with a future-retro Amy Winehouse using a space music ghetto blaster to kill some dudes … and a satyr! Don’t make the art very good. I need it to win a ten-star rating on a website of terrible sci-fi cover art. Why are you looking at me like that?

Published 1961

You might remember this from here

and also here

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.23 out of 10)
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Sep 30

And another thing it's freezing in here! Can we at least get some HEAT!Click for full image

Tom Noir Comments: Gawd, Sarah, I told ya there’s a reason we don’t come to this restaurant anymore!
Published 1995

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.58 out of 10)
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