Good Show Sir

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GK Comments: When you point your finger at someone, there are three pointing back at you.
Published 2004

Tag Wizard Comments: We’re on holiday this week. Enjoy these blasts from the past!

(Average: 7.62 out of 10)

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“You have to have a sense of humor, darling, to be alive. Even a bit mad. It helps to be mad.”
Peter Cushing

Welcome readers to a world of fear, pain, man-tigers, wizards, mind bending horror and damsels in distress. Here we have a collection of the scariest covers sent in by our followers, or should I call them… minions! mu HA HA HA HAAAAA!

Anyway, I hope people have a good Halloween weekend and if you are dressing up or at least watching the fabulous 1958 Hammer Horror version of Dracula, I hope you all have a great time.

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Libraryman’s Art Direction: Ok, now this is a scary book right? Well, what’s better than skulls? Am I right? I want a big one though, yeah I don’t care that real skulls don’t look that big, what am I an anatomist?? Oh and a crab claw. Gotta have a crab claw.
Published 1987

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Neil’s Art Direction: A flooded city burns in the background, they’ll be a rotting head in the water. Nah, thats not enough, lets add something else. A toad maybe.
Published 1993

Graham’s Art Direction: This is a collection of horror stories by a world-famous author, so I really want you to go to town on the cover art. Try and capture the gothic-horror aspect: make the reader feel that these stories could be taking place right now in his own neighborhood. [looks at this quarter’s finances] Ah, never mind, we’ll just send them something from one of those sci-fi books that got canceled.
Published 1976

(Average: 7.62 out of 10)

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Good Show Sir comments: “Take the jab, dammit!”

Thanks to Ryan for sending this in!

You might remember this from here.

Published 1954

(Average: 7.62 out of 10)

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Stevie T. Comments: I imagine the conversation went something like this:
Underling: “Sir, we just got Louis L’Amour’s latest manuscript…”
Publisher: “Great! Slap some cowboys on the cover and get it out there!”
Underling: “um…but sir it’s not a Western. It’s a Science Fiction novel.”
Publisher: “What?”
Underling: “You know, Science Fiction, like parallel universes, alien invasions, that sort of thing…”
Publisher: “…. Are there Indians in it.”
Underling: “Native Americans? Um, yes, but—-“
Publisher: “Great! Slap something bizarre and Indian on it and get it out there!”
Underling: “but—“
Publisher: “I said get it out there!”

Published 1987

(Average: 7.62 out of 10)

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Ok! What would gods normally do, while inhabiting the body of a busty half naked women? Hmmm, how about standing by a sweet tower glowing oddly, on all fours in front of some sort of cat creature and swinging a sword about to decapitate a snake. Gods are all about the sexual innuendo! Yeaaaaahhhhaaa!

Thanks to David D!

(Average: 7.61 out of 10)

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Rusty Comments: My eyes, they hurt. Now I sleepless.
Published 2010

(Average: 7.61 out of 10)

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Throw out this idea of a whole picture and think in terms of layers. Just concentrate on four of them, a women with a bad hair cut firing a laser, a tiny women in a floating tea cup, a huge bald guy about to attack and some people in an arena watching. Slap it all together and we’re sorted!

(Average: 7.61 out of 10)

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Hello there sir, could I stop you for a quick survey today? Excellent. Imagine that we gave you a cover that included terrible fonts, a man with a very chiseled chin in some sort of armour, holding his short bow. Then pump tons of strange glows and lens flare on places you’d not expect. On scale of one to ten, how likely are you going to take this on a bus with you? Sir? Come back! Sir?

(Average: 7.61 out of 10)

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I haven’t done a mega post or an honourable mentions in a while so here we go! Here’s a collection of some special French covers sent in by Cedric and Paul. Thanks very much and I hope everyone enjoys them!

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Cedric Comments: Here is a wonderfully psychedelic and disturbing cover. This is before Photoshop, in the late 70s/early 80s.
Published 1977

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Cedric Comments: Note the strange animal at the front, confused about whether it should be a polar bear, an unicorn or some kind of big eagle. Or maybe a big confused cat, judging by the claws? And of course you can find a lightly clad lady in the back, requested by the marketing department to boost sales.
Published 1982

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Cedric Comments: There is something highly disturbing about these little hairy folks.
Published 1990

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Paul’s Art Direction: Mutants have eyes. This is an anthology of mutant stories that means lots of eyes in fact so many eyes you could float on them, do it!
Published 1974

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Paul’s Art Direction: Make everything droopy!
Published 1972

(Average: 7.61 out of 10)

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Tom Noir Comments: Free two-day shipping with Amazon Prime?!? I’m going to order a dozen of these things!

Published 1980

(Average: 7.61 out of 10)

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