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Apr 01

Face it John, you can't draw trees!

Click for full image

WEELLL!! How about a guy in a space ship pointing at some futuristic map. Hmmm, yeah, you are right, it’s just not sci-fi enough! How about putting in someone with a straight bowl hair cut, and a huge werewolf creature with botox lips?!

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 5.74 out of 10)
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Mar 31

I vant to have U... for dinnar! Va ha ha ha... No seriously.... Indian ok?Click for full Image

Art direction: Give me a big pasty vampire, fresh from his WoD LARP, and an appartition of the guy that played Q from Star Trek. The nerds will love it, I know!

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.36 out of 10)
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Mar 26

You're a white witch... I'm a black samurai.. opposites attract, right?

Horses. Three horses to be exact! Well, lets put a generic ranger on one of them, but I was thinking of something different for the others…. Oh! A female sorcerer and a huge black samurai! Man, this is going to be a bestseller!

Thanks to CSA!

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 4.19 out of 10)
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Mar 24

Wow good call on how to keep door-to-door sales men away!

Art direction: I want this cover to scream EVILLL!!! Yes, yes, just like before. But this time forget the pentagram and just put an evil tree with friggin’ lightning coming out from its branches!

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 4.64 out of 10)
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Mar 23

Uh guys... do you see that singing boobed werewolf there? No? Uh ohClick for larger image

Good Show Sir Art Direction A vast ocean with ships sailing through it’s calm seas, the sun piercing through the picturesque clouds and trees with running rivers in the background. Oh, and a female werewolf resting her huge boobs on a sword, howling upwards with a dark halo…….what are you looking me like that for?

Published 1989

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 5.52 out of 10)
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Mar 20

Look, I have a flower.. I told you I have sensitive side!

Art direction: Right, I want this cover to scream EVILLLLL! Have a cloaked dark figure drawing a pentagram with a big nerd fantasy dagger. Have you ever been LARP’ING? Just like that!

Thanks to CSA!

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 4.73 out of 10)
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Mar 19

Didn't you think to mention you could cast fireballs?
Art direction: I have two words for you: Magic Fireball! Have some leather clad guy holding an old school hunting rife casting it. Just make sure that the fireball is purple! Magic is purple…. right?

Thanks to CSA!

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.33 out of 10)
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Mar 17

Ha! Try stop my magic juggling powers!

Art direction: Actually, I wasn’t really looking for an actual castle. Instead, could you have a couple of people juggling things with little water tentacle creatures and others watching them? And if we had a close up of one of the guys making you think “is he juggling those balls with magic… or just… well, juggling?” … anyway, if we had that, that’d be juuuust great.

Thanks to CSA!

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.37 out of 10)
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Mar 17

Wait... wait say that again. How much oxygen do we have.. and how long to dragons live?
Click for full river of lava!

Art direction: A huge lake of lava flowing down from a pointed ice mountain, and a dragon chasing some guys encased in a magic crystal of ice as they meander down the lava. Wait… there’s something missing isn’t there… Got it! Have a white ice eagle chase them too. But is it their companion or tormentor?

Thanks to Stu!

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.51 out of 10)
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Mar 16

No offense, you're not really made for stealth darling!

Art direction: *hick* man I am SOooo drunk. I love you man… LOVE YOU! Wha? Oh yea… some sorta orbital dome with a guy and a gun… wait… better throw in a glowing women… in tight latex, big rack… hahaha! How more stereotypical can I get? Throw in a glowing sword too!

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.75 out of 10)
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