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Jun 15

It has been a while since we’ve had an Honourable Mention post, so following are some of the recent doozies that didn’t meet our strict, fiercely-enforced rules for cover submissions. Enjoy!

Doctor PooClick for larger image

Leah Comments: I know it’s a tie-in, but this is definitely worthy of an Honorable Mention. That lettering is not actually black, it is bright orange metallic foil. I think it says a great deal that the picture is an accurate depiction of the featured aliens.

 

 

What's keeping the pyramids from falling off?Click for larger image

Leah Comments: Another Honorable-Mention-worthy tie-in. Working title: ‘Attack of the Fifty-Foot Fop’.

 

I just 'chat' myselfCliquez pour enlever le mouton

Joachim Comments: A French cat woman? There’s so much wrong with this cover.

 

 

A screaming comes across my eyesClick for larger image

Bibliomancer Comments: I don’t think it’s technically science fiction. But Lordy, is this a bad cover.

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.64 out of 10)
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Mar 29

Painting: 'The Horrors of Interplanetary War' by Sir Johnny Bruck, National Portrait GalleryClick for full image

Bibliomancer Comments: In the future, hair restoration technology has entered a new dark age.

Published 1970

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.33 out of 10)
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Feb 02

What a maroon ...Click for full image

Tom Noir Comments: It was a long road, but this would eventually become a major motion picture starring Matt Damon.

Published 1967

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.81 out of 10)
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Nov 08

The focus group isn't sure they like the new superheroClick for full image

Tag Wizard Comments: Arrgghh! This Spanx® leotard is cutting off my circulation!
Published 1982

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.82 out of 10)
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Sep 19

That's one hell of a gun!Click to blow up that Bakery … so to speak

JaunPaul Comments: And so began the devastating War of the Last Cannoli.
Published 2015

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.21 out of 10)
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Jul 26

Nothing says serious science fiction like a cartoon font.Click to embiggen that DVD

Good Show Sir Comments: Two words of tactical advice, Earthman: ZIG and ZAG.

Published 1963

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.23 out of 10)
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Jul 18

We hold the gun like this.. so we can use our tiny hip hands for jazz!Click for full image

mosquito_wenzi’s Art Direction: So, to make these aliens look really alien, make the upper torso look like it couldn’t possibly be connected to the lower torso. And you only have to paint one; we’ll copy paste him to create more in the background.
Published 2006

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.79 out of 10)
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Jul 06

You've had a busy day little man. Time to go to 'sleep'Click for full image

Bibliomancer Comments: They hired the robot nanny and housekeeper because Dad kept getting caught cheating with the female help.

Published 1959

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.55 out of 10)
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Jun 29

Come now person sized t-rex... ignore the giant laser man and bring your space ship toy!Click for full image

Tom Noir Comments: “Thank Zorgon everything on this world is so tiny,” mused our hero. “I wouldn’t want to face that dinosaur full size. Hey,” he added, “is that guy wearing a nappy?”
Published 1985

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.63 out of 10)
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Jun 15

Is she far away... or just small?Click for full image

Tom Noir Comments: Earl’s plan to hide from the Future Women inside one of their own vagina’s proved a failure.
Published 1973

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.89 out of 10)
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