Good Show Sir

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Libraryman comments: I love how it seems as if the characters are just randomly placed around this dead body. Kind of like a cluedo clue. “It was Sinbad with the scimitar in the dungeon!”
Published 1995

This cover… is perfect!
Libraryman, good show sir!

(Average: 7.49 out of 10)

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Jeweleya Comments: This cover is so off-putting to me that I can’t bring myself to read the book. A few highlights –

• The sword dissolving into blue dust
• The barbarian’s barely-decent rags (it’s refreshing that the woman is wearing more than the man, for once)
• The utterly generic, swirly, rainbow-threw-up-on-it background
• And my personal favorite: the horse that looks like it’s just been flung backwards from a giant slingshot

…Indeed, a cover for the ages.
Published 1978

Many thanks to Jeweleya!

(Average: 7.13 out of 10)

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Don Comments: “Helmets with bunny ears will overpower helmets with horns every time. So sayeth Ason the Incredibly Bored!”
Published 1973

Many thanks to Don!

(Average: 6.78 out of 10)

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Art Direction: Kinda like those raunchy romance book covers with real people. Expect with a magical dragon and a hunky wizard waving around his magical staff. Who wouldn’t want to sleep with a guy who dresses like a wizard? Actually… good point… make sure to hire a model.
Published 2003

(Average: 4.84 out of 10)

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Tom Noir’s Art Direction: Okay, this is a Celtic fantasy, so obviously we want a buff surfer dude who is spaced out of his gourd. What? I dunno, put him in a kilt or something. You figure it out, that’s what you’re paid for isn’t it? Anyhow, magic it up. Slap a shiny silver border on with the author’s name in a clashing red font to distract suspicious readers. Anyhoo, I gotta jet, it’s 4:20.
Published 1993

Many thanks to Tom!

(Average: 8.45 out of 10)

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Tommi Comments: The blurb on the back translates as: “… Where Sturgeon, LeGuin, Heinlein and Russ where merely scratching the surface in their attempt to appropriately represent human sexuality in Science Fiction, David Gerrold is digging a deep shaft.” No comment, really, apart from, maybe – uuurgh.
Published 1978

Nice speedos!
Many thanks to Tommi!

(Average: 7.70 out of 10)

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Well after CSA’s comments yesterday with Mr Ellison I noted he said this, “We should post a pic of the Bible tomorrow and see if Jesus posts within 24hours.”

I decided to take him up on that suggestion with this, sent into me about a year ago. And to Mr Ellison, I sent CSA to bed last night without super and I didn’t even read him his nightly install of Harry Potter verses Terminator. Thanks for commenting!

A real cover will be posted later!

Good Show Sir, Good Sir.

(Average: 6.88 out of 10)

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Giles Comments: I love the Taltos novels, but these covers actually stopped me buying the books several times – they’re so cheesy. True, the artist gets some credit for getting the jhereg (the winged reptile) approximately right, but that doesn’t really offset the general awfulness.

Tache-tastic! Thanks to Giles!

(Average: 8.16 out of 10)

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Harry Comments: According to the author, this cover was commissioned for another book but somehow ended up on hers. It’s very loosely appropriate: there is a sword, and there is a hero, but he is quite explicitly gay.

Superb! Thanks Harry!

(Average: 7.68 out of 10)

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Well I am thinking, man in miniskirt stands in the background with a very large sword. Then we’ll have a man standing in the foreground thrusting his sword from his pelvis as he furiously… well. Lets just say he looks furious, the destroyed viewers’ minds will do the rest.

(Average: 8.57 out of 10)

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