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Jan 26

Mother.. did you come into the dark forest in your dressing gown again?!!Click for full image

Fantasy readers can’t think for themselves! They need one thing, hyper realism! It’s a phrase I’m coining. So well have a guy in his pajamas and an old women in a dressing gown staring at a magical glowing orb in the palm of the dudes hand. All set within a dark forest.

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 5.60 out of 10)
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Jun 15

When cut-and-past artwork used actual scissors and glueClick for larger image

Randall Frost Comments “Steve, I’m cool with indulging the whole scuba fetish thing, but I’m not wearing that dolphin head!”

Published 1982

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 5.60 out of 10)
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Apr 27

Ok.. don't let the dragon set us on fire, don't let the dragon set us on fire. don't let the... OH CRAP!Click for full image

NGpm Comments: This is one busy cover. Why does the dragon-saurus have a blue and red aura? Is the horse fireproof? You know this dragon’s dynamite: “look at the bones, man!” Overall the art isn’t bad, but the typography and that blurb about the Newberry is just so awkward.
Published 1986

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 5.59 out of 10)
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Feb 23

How long we going to pose like this? I can't feel my legs.Click for full image

Nothinggets the attention ofwomen more than standing in the midst of an ice cavern with little clothes and showing off your bare chest. Holding your short sword in an inspiring way while standing by your Viking boat sleigh. That’s right. A boat sleigh.

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 5.58 out of 10)
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Sep 10

Dam it they protected the catnip with lasers.Click for full image

Word association game: say the first two words that come into your head when I say “Sci Fi”. Laser guns? WRONG! It’s cat people! Eat your words! Though, lasers… not bad actually. Add them in with some weird cloaked alien holding a gun. Might help distract from the fact we have friggin’ cat people on there.

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 5.58 out of 10)
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Dec 08

Men.. always more interested in jarred brains than their 50's pinup girl!Click for full image

Jaouad’s Art Direction: Ok, this book is about a brain in a jar, so we’ll have a big glowing brain in a jar. With some wires and electrical discharges please, so the audience knows it’s Science. And give it evil eyesockets while you’re at it. An infinity parking lot in the background. A scientist chap. Oh, and a girl, of course. A girl in a frilly dress. With cleavage. And nailpolish.
Published 1950

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 5.58 out of 10)
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Apr 08

Quick! Magic Missile them! They're after your perm!Click for full image

Typical blonde helpless maiden, possibly a wench from the local drinkery. Then a typical bartender looking guy with perm, a wooden magic wand, a glowing wrist band and a red misty entity coming from the side. Come on… do I have to think of everything?!?!

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 5.58 out of 10)
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Sep 12

Ah.. this explains why you were hearing the universe in your seashellClick for full image

Good Show Sir’s Art Direction: Look this has to stand out from the rest. But how…. ummm… put a magic sea shell with stars of the universe in it. Have a disinterested man staring at it… and a blue women who is already so bored she’s fallen asleep.
Published 1993

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 5.57 out of 10)
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Feb 15

My friends are part of the NRA! Let me out of here!Click for full image

Good Show Sir Comments: That’s not creases in the book cover… that’s barbed wire!
Published 1989

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 5.57 out of 10)
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Jul 09

Old buttmouth is backClick for larger image

Jabrone Comments … and elephants come in quarts.

You might remember this from here.

Published 1976

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 5.57 out of 10)
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