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Oct 12

Sturgeon in Orbit

18 Comments »

I... think I'll stop at the next space station...Click for full image

Billy Awesome Comments: Pull out all the stops.  I want the head of Sturgeon as a devil, floating on an asteroid made partially of humanoid hands and torsos, and partially of a futuristic city that looks like a garbage truck, his hair a naked lady with a peacock feather magic aura, his brow haloed by dollar store xmas tinsel.  I want a topless mermaid riding a unicorn over a chain that secures nothing.  I want an astronaut trying to take a smoke break through his bubble helmet, and a nude baby on a floating cockle shell awestruck by the majesty of it all.  Don’t let me down.  Let’s make some magic!
Published 1964

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.53 out of 10)
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Sep 02

Midnight at the Well of Souls

16 Comments »

If I can just cut this sash I can lose the midget and outrun these angry aliens. Click for full image

Bibliomancer’s Art Direction: A centaur-babe with an evil papoose devil-baby being chased by an alien army that looks like surfboards with eyes. Have that on my desk by five! And don’t forget the purse!
Published 1977

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.14 out of 10)
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Aug 28

Nightchild

24 Comments »

Ewwww... just look at them. I don't even know why you invite them over for dinner in the first place.Click for full image

Scott B Comments: Creepy eyeballs! (Also, broccoli hair.)
Published 1983

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.15 out of 10)
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Jul 17

The Dark Bright Water

15 Comments »

Look out Eric! She's after our cave exploring shorts!Click for full image

Dead Stuff with Big Teeth’s Art Direction: On our cover, we won’t show ANYTHING. But legs. Lots of legs. We got a volume discount on legs.
Published 1981

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.42 out of 10)
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Mar 30

The Reefs of Earth

17 Comments »

Let's not do bring your kids to work day anymore... Dan's kid freaks me out.Click for slightly larger image

Joachim Comments: Everyone needs more covers with elf boys!
Published 1970

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.73 out of 10)
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Jun 06

Strange Relations

43 Comments »

..... < o_0 > .....Click for full UNSHEEPED image

Joachim Comments: Old man breasts, stump hands, back slug, purple eggs, fanged man baby chillin’ out in one of the purple eggs while a snake bites…
Published 1976

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.80 out of 10)
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Mar 05

Fox and Empire

34 Comments »

Well, we fired the baby at them. Do we have any more? No? Time to surrender.Click for full image

Tom Noir Comments:
“Our toddlers will blot out the sun!”
“Then we will fight in the shade!”
Published 1998

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.48 out of 10)
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Jun 19

Prentice Alvin

40 Comments »

Sir... is it wise to do your blacksmithing naked? Click for full image

DPN Comments: This one of sort of popped out at me!
Uncertain publication date (circa 1996?)

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.56 out of 10)
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Jun 11

The Dragon Guard: The Magickers #3

35 Comments »

And so, the children avoided being eaten by a dragon... through magical interpretive dance!Click for full image

Tom Noir Comments: Gym class will never be the same again!
Published 2003

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.87 out of 10)
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Jun 07

Driftglass

28 Comments »

Good to see that in the worlds behond 2001, eyepatches are still awesome!Click for full image

Tat Wood Comments: The back-cover blurb begins with the word WHY? in big letters, further comment is superfluous.
Published 1983 (First Published with this cover 1971)

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.50 out of 10)
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