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Apr 09

Juiced and joining the Olympics weight-lifting teamClick to juice up front covers

As featured on yourrussianbride.netClick for back cover augmentation

It’s a Two-fer Tuesday: Russian Dick Blade … and friends!

Good Show Sir Comments: My Google Russian translator tells me the top line says “J. Lord” and РИЧАРД БЛЕЙД is “Richard Blade” and the last line on each is “Hero” and “Winner”. I am assuming they are some sort of omnibus volumes. Feel free to translate.

Thanks to Alex for sending this in.

Published 1994

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.88 out of 10)
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Apr 02

Only two honourable mentions for the long Easter weekend! Mainly because I have completely lost track of what’s in my inbox!

Good to be back and posting covers again, thanks to everyone for supporting me through the dark times! You all get a cookie!

HEY! GET OF ME TORTOISE! Click for full image

Piper Comments: It isn’t exactly fantasy/science fiction. It’s psychology. The longer you look the more insane it gets (E.G. Eagle heads in crystals).
Unknown published date

So much awesomeness! Click for full image

Good Show Sir Comments: Unfortunately I never got to play this, I like to think it would be just as epic as the box art.
Published 1988

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.18 out of 10)
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Jan 30

Looks a bit more like a poleaxe to me!Click for full image

MisterBob’s Art Direction: How about a twist on the Excalibur motif, but an AXE instead of a sword. Clever, eh?
Published 1985 (maybe)

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.07 out of 10)
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Jul 05

South Park was right! There was aliens at thanksgiving!No bigger image available

Book Wench Comments: ‘Fear in Firland’ is a true masterpiece, written in the 1970s by the vicar of Ladywood, it has all the worst bits of Narnia thrown in with some Native American (?) possibly Middle Ages… something… Any cover that can combine flying saucers and squirrels are okay with me!
Published 1974

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.43 out of 10)
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Jun 01

Another bank holiday approaches for those in the UK! And also something about celebrating some sort of zombie vampire’s diamond jubilee… so I hear. So we might be taking a break until Wednesday while we sharpen our stakes and resurrect Peter Cushing to stop the foul beast!

So for our honourable mentions we have a collection of books about J. R. R. Tolkien and one about C. S. Lewis. These are simply fantastic and have all been sent in by Missie Kay so a big thanks to her!

Enjoy the covers and if you are benefiting from a long weekend, like me, I hope you enjoy it!

This is why they banned smoking in Bars & Pubs!Click for full image

Missie Comments: That’s not what “high fantasy” means, guys.

Just wait till you see where I keep Boromir!Click for slightly large image

Missie Comments: Not a very clear photo, sorry, but Gandalf and Gollum are on his shoulder, and there’s hobbit in his vest pocket.

Well I broke my back to sit here... I am going to finish this story!Click for full image

Missie Comments: Just hangin’ with some orcs.

Oh please... talk to the hand Troll... Talk to the hand!Click for full image

Missie Comments: Gollum clearly finds J.R.R. more frightening than the giant cave troll staring at him. (back cover of the previous book)

I believe Lewis should step in for Space Sheep at some stage!!!Click for full image

Missie Comments: Bonus cover! C.S. Lewis looks a bit shocked that there’s a naked lady behind him.

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.61 out of 10)
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Apr 05

Here we are again! It’s been a while for the old honourable mentions but it’s come to that time of year when a can of irn-bru and chocolate is considered an acceptable breakfast!

So if you are having a weekend off I hope you enjoy it and if not… well enjoy these covers that don’t quite make our high standards but we think deserve a special mention.

Have fun!

You don't want to see the new jedi order... It ain't pretty!Click for full image

Good Show Sir Comments: I love Mark Hamill’s pose on this one. It’s got that, “Why are you drawing me?” Look.

Holy Crap Kid, that was one hell of a wind machine!Click for full image

Good Show Sir’s Art Direction: Well I like these three drawings you’ve done. I know! Lets just put them all together on the cover.

Anyone remember the film Critters?Click for full image

Matthew’s Art Direction: I want the scariest-looking monster that you can think of on the front!

This is my mother. We're very close. Isn't she sweet? And the best thing about her is: she can really take a punch. - What's Up Tiger LilyClick for full image

Stripey Baz Comments: I’m no purveyor of romance novels or indeed Norwegian literature, but I’m pretty sure that it’s not a good thing to have a mutton-chopped blaggard slap a fair maiden across her face. Given the angle that he’s standing at, his body must have twisted like one of those plastic toy action figures…

 

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.16 out of 10)
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Aug 29

Well today is a bank holiday and I completely forgot about it. Almost got up to go to work! Almost…

So for all your enjoyment here is a few covers that I believe make the Honourable Mentions standard! Have a good holiday for those who remembered!

No! I said lets go get tanked... not lets go make ourselves some tank hats that we can't see out of!Click for full image

DarkZlorf Comments: I’m sure I left my tank parked around here?
Published 1979

I'm going to use my magic globe to see how the battle is going, instead of turning around.Click for full image

Completely stolen from the wonderful Awful Library Books, but because the top left is clearly a copy of Keith Parkinson’s Dragons of War, I thought it too good not to mention! Thanks to John for letting me know about it!

Paper Dolls... more manly than just dolls. Or at least, that's what I told myself.Click for full image

So I found this is in a touristy shop in the wonderful San Diego… paper dolls… what’s with that? Anyway, I had hours of fun recreating all my covers that day!
Published 2010

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.23 out of 10)
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Jun 22

Cats finally knew how to fetch... until the great fire...Click for full image

MisterBOB Comments: There’s this great scene in the book,where the tiger has a burning log in his mouth and it looks just like a cigar. So funny.
Published between 1983 – 1988

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.63 out of 10)
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Feb 11

This covers have all been sent in by River and I thought they might all make an excellent mega post. Thanks very much to River who has also provided some information about each!

I'm way too happy to be jumping over a M!Click for full image

Contains 100 short stories by Hungarian authors.
Published 2003

My right arm is huge! My left... not so much.Click for full image

This third hardcover reissue contains two novels written by a Hungarian author under English pseudonym. Writing fantasy and science fiction stories under English pen names was very popular in the 90s. And many readers really thought that these writers are from abroad.
Published 1999

At least it doesn't feckin' sparkle!Click for full UNSHEEPED image

Translating the Hungarian title to English was also a strange tradition in these books just like the English pen names for Hungarian writers. You can read inside that, A szellemlt, means, The Spiritseer. Hardcover.
Published 2005

That's cheating! No hydraulics allowed!Click for full image

j Galaxis is a science fiction magazine published twice a year in Hungary. Guess which years product is this one. 1988? You slipped twenty years. This issue is only three years old.
Published 2008

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.93 out of 10)
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Jan 11

I didn't think giant eyes had their own jet propulsion... learn something new every year...Click for full image

Danielle Comments: For dry, red eyes…
Published Date Unknown

Turns out this book might be apocalyptic Christian literature by E G White.
We appologise, but the cover is still pretty epic!

Thanks to Phil for helping locate info!

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.59 out of 10)
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