Good Show Sir

Click for full image

So I think we’ll just have some naked redhead riding her giant insect in the midst of pleasure. That’s the type of thing every teenage boy imagines, right?

Many thanks to NoiselessPenguin!

(Average: 7.71 out of 10)

Loading...

Click for full image

Well I am thinking, man in miniskirt stands in the background with a very large sword. Then we’ll have a man standing in the foreground thrusting his sword from his pelvis as he furiously… well. Lets just say he looks furious, the destroyed viewers’ minds will do the rest.

(Average: 8.57 out of 10)

Loading...

Click for full image

Jen comments: I was going to talk about his lack of spacesuit, or his overabundance of cleavage, or the protruding rock in space. Then I noticed that one of the strange ghost-images was smoking a cigar, and all words failed me.

Thanks to Jen! Good Find!

(Average: 8.16 out of 10)

Loading...

Click for full image

Eron Comments: This cover is particularly appalling because of it’s simplicity. We get the text: Unicorns. Peace. Then the image: Unicorn. Twilight. BIG ORANGE Unicorn. Castle. Sure. Also, it seems to me that something is wrong on the perspective on the unicorn… it’s sort of falling on it’s side if I’m seeing it correctly?

Many thanks to Eron!

(Average: 6.54 out of 10)

Loading...

Click for full image

I love the realism, so we’ll definitely have to get that on there. In fact I think we should tone it down a little. We’ll keep it simple so it’s not too bad (and almost like it’s creeping up on its prey) then WHAM! We’ll hit them with a gold black red title banner!

(Average: 6.69 out of 10)

Loading...

Click for full image

Nothing – and I mean nothing – attracts readers more than naked children. What.. why are you looking at me like that? Why are you leaving? Guys? Guys?

Thanks to Dave R – The ever-living!

(Average: 8.55 out of 10)

Loading...

And now for the real cover:

Click for full image

You might remember seeing this previously on Good Show Sir: Sunrunner’s Fire

Stutzman comments: So here is the Australia cover for that very same book (found in a used bookstore in the US), which is hideous beyond words. Same general elements: dragon, wizardly dude in robes, rocks. The execution, however… oh, my eyes.

Thanks very much to Stutzman!

(Average: 6.73 out of 10)

Loading...

Art Direction: Hold on a second, I’m just finishing my morning bourbon. Alright lets see, could we get naked women with impressive cleavage? What about a man with a laser sword fighting off some cat people? No? Man you are picky. How about a t-rex travelling through time eating historical figures? In fact that’s brilliant… get Roberts to re-write this thing!

Art Director: Sweet lord. What is this… what have you given me?
Artist: Uh, a flying city and some storm clouds.
Art Director: Now come on, I have it on record Amory requested a naked man wrestling a man tiger, both wearing bondage gear.
Artist: Was… that in the book? Who the hell is Amory?
Art Director: Stop asking technical questions and draw or you don’t get your curly wurly!!

(Average: 3.71 out of 10)

Loading...

Click for full image

NoiselessPenguin Comments: I tried to make a list of what’s wrong with this cover, and stopped when I realised: EVERYTHING.

Thanks to NoiselessPenguin, I’ve never laughed so much!

(Average: 8.62 out of 10)

Loading...

Click for full image

Tamsym comments: Found in a charity shop on the Isle of Wight, I’ve been looking for a home for this baby for six months. It’s got all the hallmarks of a classic: nipples – check; vacuous expression – check; absolutely no relevance to the title – check.

I’m not saying ghosts can’t be gay, mind. But you have to wonder about the plot arc, eh?

Thanks so much to Tamsyn!

(Average: 8.37 out of 10)

Loading...