Good Show Sir

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Rex’s Art Direction: Okay, gaudy covers are out, minimalism is in! So let’s see, what shall we put on this cover… a fish! Yes, a fish, that’s right, I’m sure they live in forests, right?

Thanks to Albertosaurus Rex!

(Average: 6.20 out of 10)

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Black in Time? Seriously? Alright then. Well I think we should artistically avoid the whole race issue and simply have a huge group of people from every background floating mid space stretching backwards into the earth. And some faces of the main characters, with an hour glass imposed on them. Somehow though, I think it’s not going to take away from the title.

Thanks to the Legend Dave R!

(Average: 8.63 out of 10)

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What if we go for something that’s kind of a cross between art and an eighties music video? We’ll have flaming eye balls and some women with retro make-up playing with her magical sticks. Then just pack any text at the top and if we can, make it like an ancient scroll banner. Classy.

(Average: 8.20 out of 10)

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So I just read from the list on this sheet? Alright then, terrible fonts, realistic guys doing manly stuff and pulling awkward faces, and a futuristic city. Might I add something of my own? Why don’t we credit only the editors and none of the authors? …You’re promoting me to management?! OHHH yeaaah!

(Average: 6.21 out of 10)

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Chess? I’m sure that’s interesting and all but that gives me nothing to work with. No wait.. it does. Pink! Pink everything up, go for the windowed look, and make sure there are lots of things blurred slightly by the light. Maybe they’ll miss out on the chess part completely!

(Average: 5.40 out of 10)

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Women love their horses and I’m pretty sure everyone grows up wanting that pony all their life. So that’s what we’ll give ’em. Except give the horse a certain quality, an almost surprised expression as he stares off into the vast distance. And give the L&D letters of the title a black fill. I can’t see that one back-firing.

(Average: 5.76 out of 10)

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Look, I am busy – what the hell do you want? Cover ideas? My god, man. You’re new here, right? Here’s the sheet, it has everything we need. Huge terrible multicoloured fonts, obligatory best selling author line and something like a women in a space suit looking generally awful. Don’t worry kid, you’ll pick it up soon enough. Then you’ll be one with us. Don’t run… don’t run…

(Average: 5.13 out of 10)

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OH man, do I have a bad hangover! I need something soothing, like a half naked teenager holding a guitar and a bit of blood trickling from his mouth. His hair slicked back, his skin pale like that of a… vampire! That’s right, I did just suggest it: a vampire guitarist! Uh-oh, I’m going to be sick.

(Average: 8.49 out of 10)

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Naked people? You’re right, we can’t have two yellow glowing buck-naked people standing on some far away planet, with the man pointing upwards towards some awful green moon that takes up 80% of the cover. Oh I know, cover their jibblets with some storks. And we’re sorted!

Happy St. Patricks day! – Good Show Sir

(Average: 8.03 out of 10)

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Eighties cartoons are just fantastic, aren’t they. Wait a second… What if we go for that eighties look? Musclebound guy wearing strange straps which have no benefit and gold bracelets. Holding aloft his magic glowing scepter. No one is going to forget this cover anytime soon!

(Average: 8.02 out of 10)

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