Aug 14
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You know what people are into these days… dressing up like strange animal creatures. So put a couple of people talking to some weird bunny person.. just like the convention we were at last week! Except less of the, you know, horrible single 45 year old men looking for sex. Take away from that with a huge space ship in the sky with the author’s name printed in horrible fonts.

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Tagged with: anthropomorphism • Baen Books • damsel • epic thoughts • font problems • Future History series • omnibus • once you see it • Patrick Turner • Robert A. Heinlein • space ships • strange creature
Aug 13
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I’m really not sure about what I want… So how about some weird horse-camel type creatures, something that would make The Great Lucas proud! Don’t forget to add a terrible landscape, an awful off planet sunset, and some people pointing a huge antenna to the sky.

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Tagged with: beast-riding • Bob Eggleton • C.J. Cherryh • cloaks • Gene Wars series • HarperCollins Books • once you see it • strange creature
Aug 12
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We’ve both been talking this over and really there is one thing we need on our cover. A horrific font! Have it big, bold, blocky and have the ‘fought’ look like someone has tried to adjust the colour balance in photoshop and then forgot about it. For the rest, just have some women crawling out of the air vent shooting an android. But seriously, who cares about the artwork these days.

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Tagged with: Anne McCaffrey • Baen Books • Brainship series • cybernetics • font problems • glow • gun • Haircut 100 • once you see it • S.M. Stirling • space ships • Stephen Hickman
Aug 11
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Well I want a red headed women talking to a camp looking dragon while she shows a bit of leg. Andre.. stop laughing! It’s not like your covers are any better! Jeeeezz… Ah F it.. just put a well built guy laughing his ass off in the background. That can be you Andre…you knob.

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Tagged with: Andre Norton • damsel • dragon • dude • Halfblood Chronicles series • Julie Bell • Mercedes Lackey • once you see it • Tor Books • waistcoat
Aug 10
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As a women I know that there are two main things we love about men. Long hair with hunky muscles being one of them, *drool*, and the ability to fire a light weight fast action submachine gun at any given point. What’s that you say – this book’s in the Fantasy genre? Oh yeah, forgot that element… uhhh ok then, lens flare the gun and put some transparent eyes in the sky. Now that’s what I call Fantasy Romance!

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Tagged with: dude • fantastical rock star • gun • Livia Dare • muscles • Sapphire series • sky-eyes • stallone pose • Sylvia Day • Zebra Books
Aug 07
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Some artists define a generation: Picasso, Michelangelo, Paul Klee… I want you to be inspired by their works and create something for me. Think of these things: hookers, cats, bats, stereotype vampires, a real man with long cheesy hair holding his long sword. And to make it art, we place them all…. between worlds! Together, my friend, we will define the next generation!

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Tagged with: Bantam Books • bats • bladed weapons • castle • Cats! • Chronicles Of The King's Tramp series • cleavage • dude • glow • Kevin Johnson • long haired men • magic • sword • Tom De Haven • vampire
Aug 06
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Two words for you…. pirates vs kinky police officers. Well you know what I mean! Have the officers in long knee highs and holding a large batons. Have a large magic beam hitting a stereotypical pirate in the chest and him grimacing in pain. It’s almost too perfect.

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Tagged with: bladed weapons • blunt weapons • club • daggers • Darrell K. Sweet • frickin laser beams • L.E. Modesitt Jr. • magic • pirates • Saga of Recluce • sword • Tor Books • uniforms
Aug 05
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Imagine this, you are a female knight… awww come on, I said imagine… and you have come into the future only to find… wait for it.. space ships! And a futuristic station! This cover will be one of the greatest comparisons of public transport ever! Oh, don’t forget the transparent eyes in the sky too.

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Tagged with: anatomical issues • Baen Books • horses • James C. Glass • knights • Richard Martin • sky-eyes • space ships
Aug 04
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You know the two things I love: big bosomed women and lizards. Have them woven in an epic battle, lizard versus women as she tries to slice at it with her magical blade. Don’t go all crazy on me though, concentrate on the boobs.

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Tagged with: Baen Books • bladed weapons • cleavage • damsel • dragon • fire • John Lambshead • lizard • lizard people • magical weapon • sword
Aug 03
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I’m telling you, Romance + Generic Fantasy Elements = MONEY! Ahh, who cares about the cover, just put a big hunky man showing off his chest muscles and flexed abs. We’ll call him the dragon master… What do you mean “is his dragon purple”?
And we are back! Ohhhh YEAh!
– Good Show Sir

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Tagged with: Allyson James • Ashley Gardner • Berkley Books • dragon • Dragon series • dude • Jennifer Ashley • muscles • sixpack abs
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