Nov 10
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You know what I love about Ireland? All the dwarfs, the mysterious dark riders on horses, the barmaids that insist on carrying a bow and arrow with them, the extreme landscapes and, of course, the rainbows so I know where to find my pot of gold. We should turn that into a cover someday, my boy.
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Tagged with: archery weapons • beard-wielding • bladed weapons • Book of the Painter series • bracers • castle • cloaks • daggers • damsel • dwarf • Headline books • rainbow • shortbow • Stephen Bradbury • sword
Oct 28
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A scary witch-shard in the middle. Who am I to deny the cover of something the title mentions? Oh, and some dude firing a bow. OH, and some scary bear creeping up in the background. OHHHH – and some hot women with a dagger giving the uncomfortable twisted-body ass-pose. But most importantly: Shiny, keep it shiny.
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Tagged with: archery weapons • Baen Books • bear • beard-wielding • BEHIND YOU! • bladed weapons • daggers • damsel • Dave Freer • double trouble • dude • Gary Ruddell • Lion's Shadow series • longbow • shiny oh so shiny • witch
Oct 12
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Two fine gentlemen sir! Both of them wearing only the finest apparel that royalty can buy. On top of the highest castle tower pointing into the distance in ponderous thought. Leaving the viewer with a single thought, ‘Health and safety ain’t great in this castle.’
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Tagged with: bird • bladed weapons • booties • castle • clouds • daggers • DAW Books • Inda series • long haired men • Matt Stawicki • once you see it • prince • Sherwood Smith
Sep 22
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I’m not one to stray from tradition. I’m talking about a dragon in the background, as black as…. uh… AC/DC? Peering at our antagonist will be a huge white wolf and her damsel companion holding the tiniest of flames. Remember, I am also talking traditional proportions here, so make sure nothing is sized relative to anything else. Now who’s up for some Hells’ Bells?
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Tagged with: anatomical issues • bladed weapons • daggers • damsel • dragon • fire • Firekeeper Saga series • Jane Lindskold • Julie Bell • Tor Books • wolf
Sep 14
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With books today, you know what people are too obsessed with? That’s right, art! Why not (and you are going to love this) just have a female model dressed up as a pirate, teasing a little as she holds her swords to her lofty chest. With the addition of a terrible font we’ll draw a completely accurate picture of how things were like in ‘ye olden days.’
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Tagged with: Berkley Books • bladed weapons • bracers • cleavage • daggers • damsel • Elizabeth Vaughan • Epic of Palins series • sword • Unknown Artist Institute • waistcoat
Aug 31
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With such a great confulence of fantasy and romance, we must voyage into a realm of highest art and… ahhh, who am I kidding. Busty red headed women holding her huge dagger! Do not, on your life, forget the glow.
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Tagged with: bladed weapons • cage • Cin Craven series • cleavage • crucifix • daggers • damsel • glow • Jenna Maclaine • magic • St Martin's Press • Ting!
Aug 27
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Right, we’re in a recession, we need a cover that sells! Hmm, all black cover? You, sir, are fired! We need exploding cities in the midst of being attacked. A woman in a yellow and black striped catsuit, no wait… an alien woman! She can be holding a dagger while she peers into the foreground, completely ignoring the chaos behind her. If that doesn’t sell I’ll jump right out that window.
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Tagged with: aliens • author in the comments • bladed weapons • casually walking away from an explosion • catsuit • clouds • daggers • damsel • DAW Books • Edward Willett • explosion • gibberish title • planets • space ships • Steve Stone
Aug 20
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Look I know it’s unusual but I want an actual lynx. It doesn’t stand up like a human, it doesn’t hold some sort of laser rifle, nor does it appear from a space ship. I just want it pouncing across the cover with a princely guy in a white cape leaping with it, while he grasps his sword. That’s not as cheesy right?
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Tagged with: Ace Books • bladed weapons • castle • cloaks • daggers • Donato Giancola • leap • lynx • moon • Sharon Shinn • strange creature • Twelve Houses series
Aug 06
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Two words for you…. pirates vs kinky police officers. Well you know what I mean! Have the officers in long knee highs and holding a large batons. Have a large magic beam hitting a stereotypical pirate in the chest and him grimacing in pain. It’s almost too perfect.
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Tagged with: bladed weapons • blunt weapons • club • daggers • Darrell K. Sweet • frickin laser beams • L.E. Modesitt Jr. • magic • pirates • Saga of Recluce • sword • Tor Books • uniforms
May 12
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Remember how sweet Blade was? With all his black clothes, long trench coat, his cool body armour, his array of silver stakes and the mean emotionless yet cheerly philosophical face? Better make him caucasian just to be on the safe side.
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Tagged with: a Blade by any other name • Ace Books • bird • bladed weapons • daggers • Dave Dorman • Laws of the Blood • Susan Sizemore • vampire
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