preload
Aug 30

We have here a trio of Honourable Mentions since these are e-books and technically not being photographed sitting in our sweaty hands. But the “publisher” Phoenix Pick informs us that you can own an actual dead-tree book version of the same. The odds are vanishingly small that any book versions of these titles would ever be found in what few book stores still exist. So let’s have our fun with these e-book pix nicked from the Intertubes. I see some vestige of an artist signature on one of these. Go figure. But none of my usual sources gives any hint who they might be. So Unknown Artist Institute it is.

 

Is that you Fairy-Peg?Click for larger image

She came in through the bathroom window ...Click for larger image

I now pronounce you husband and waifClick for larger image

Good Show Sir Comments:

1. He-man and Cat-in-the-Hat take on flaming Gummi-Bear monster.

2. Stop wearing the chamois, son. I’ve got to dry the car.

3. Don’t think you’re setting a foot outside wearing that strapping outfit!

Published 2012

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 9.50 out of 10)
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Jul 04

OK kids. It's just a fun boat ride. Like Splash Mountain.Click for larger image

Jimmy Comments: “I said “socks” not “sucks”! Please don’t send me to the front lines. I’m ten years old!”

Published 1991

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 5.43 out of 10)
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Oct 11

Looking for an exciting book? Well here's a Downer!Click for larger image

Darren Comments: Huzzah! It’s bow-hunting season on faeries!

Published 1995

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.33 out of 10)
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Feb 17

They call me Captain-Mix-A-Lot!Click for full image

Good Show Sir Comments: She be hanging her arse off the poop deck.
Published 1981

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.89 out of 10)
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Jun 01

But he looked so trustworthy... with the magic crystals... and explosions....Click for full image

Tom Noir Comments: Ye poor souls, gaze upon the beardy face of PURE EEEEEEVIL!
Published 1983

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.58 out of 10)
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Sep 30

Well we had Paris yesterday… or Blackpool… or Las Vegas… anyway, it’s a loose tie-in!

Many thanks to Tat Wood who sent these in ages ago but have been sitting around due to site problems. Which, I might add, are still being looked at – I swear!

SPACCCCCCCCCCCCEEEEEEEEEEEEEE SHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP!Click for full UNSHEEPED image

Published 1986

All.. and I mean ALL authors should have this. Click for full image

Guys... you could row! I'm doing all the work here!Click for full image

Published 1987

At least it's covering up all the right parts!Click for full image

Published 1982

Beautiful anicent useless armour. Click for full image

Published 1975

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.19 out of 10)
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Mar 03

A great day fishing ruined by idiot space ship drivers!Click for full image

John C Comments: Look, you wanted me to modernise the planet so I went to IKEA and got one of their “Flty” anti-gravity beds. It’s not my fault half the bits are missing and the instructions don’t make sense.
Published 1979

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 5.54 out of 10)
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May 01

Seriously? Don't look Merman... you'll just encourage her!Click for full image

DPN Comments: I couldn’t resist buying this one. I hope this cover is an accurate depiction of a scene in the book, because I really want to know what’s going here.
Published 1984

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.78 out of 10)
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